After the Wedding

I must confess, I almost walked out during the opening credits. I wonder what that says about me. Anyhow, I remained seated for all the drama in the back row of the moviehouse. Who knew there could be so much controversy in a moviehouse: Apparently, there was a guy in the back row texting.

Now in America, texting is not such a big thing. But here, in London especially, everyone is texting all the time. I mean it. People are really married to their cellphones. Not that I'm not. I mean, when in Rome and all that, eh?

But this guy was texting, and this woman was yelling at him to stop. After all, it is a bit rude to be using your cellphone in a dark moviehouse: cellphones are like little flashlights, and they really do light up a dark space.

So there I was, with all this yelling and drama in the back row. All within the opening credits. This went on and on until at one point, the woman literally got up and left, saying, "I am going to get the manager!"

Oh what drama. I loved it! (Remember, I come from a big family, and I feel real comfortable around drama!)

Yes, the woman came back towing the manager (who looked very young and a little intimidated). Alas, the texting was stopped, the cellphone was pocketed, and no fists were thrown, no blood was shed. So much for drama.

So, back to the movie. I just thought there were way too many coincidences in this movie, one right after another. And I just really dislike improbabilities like that. I'm a realist, I guess, and I just can't swallow the fact that this Danish man (fat with success, and a great head of hair) plucked this guy (tall, and blessed with great supermodel bone structure) out of his obscure Indian school, brought him all the way to Denmark, says he'll fund the Indian school (which will otherwise have to close, of course) only if the supermodel will remain in Denmark.

Now, come on, that's just weird. And the weirdness continued, and the coincidences continued, until it was all just too much for me. In bad movies like this, why can't they just leave the lights on and let me knit? That way, I never feel like I'm wasting my time.

I have a knitting friend named Loba. (Green is to me what red is to Loba.) She is Danish. I spoke with her about this movie. I told her about my "problems" with the movie. And do you know what she said? I couldn't believe it: she explained the whole movie to me! Oh my gosh, it was amazing.

She said that there were no coincidences: that the successful businessman knew he was dying and therefore searched for the supermodel guy to come to Denmark because he (the supermodel) was the biological father of the daughter of the businessman's wife.

Complicated, I know. But when Loba put it all in perspective, I stopped disliking the movie. It's not, after all, a waste of two hours of your life. Imagine that. I do think that something must have gotten lost in the sub-titles, though.